Yeah, this evening is the start of a new batch of Patterns of Excellence (POE) – the first in Year 2006! Going back as a coach makes me feel doubly excited, as compared to the time when I attended as a participant last June.
As I’ll be fully occupied for the next 3 days in AKLTG, which means I’ll be absent during this time, so I guess the next post shall be next week, where I’m sure there’ll be lots of new things, new perspectives, new feelings and emotions, new stories, new insights blah blah blah to share with you, my dear readers!
So till then … J
“Mirror mirror on the wall. Who’s the fairest of them all?”
Remember this fairy tale Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs? Haha, for those of you who read this when you were young, we are from the same generation! Yeah! How nice ya J
Pimples! Yucks! I had, or rather, have (cos it’s still very much existing!) this “headless” pimple on my left cheek for, let me count, almost 1 month, or no, slightly more than that! You see (girls would probably understand this better) because it is “headless”, I have to wait till it has “ripen” before I can squeeze it out. Eh, I know this sound kind of queasy, but I can’t, and I have to wait patiently for the appropriate time to handle it.
Time waits for no man, hahaha J As I allowed my fingers to tread into territory that’s off-limits and wreaked havoc, that pimple ended up bleeding and now, sitting there is a red dot on my cheek! Argh … Now, I STILL can’t do anything except wait patiently, again, for nature to do its wonder healing. And, I got to deal with a probable mark after that. Haiz …
You see, at times, we just have to wait for the right time to do the right things. By tackling on some issues that could be premature at that point of time will, most probably, aggravate matters. Especially true when it comes to matters of the heart. But this doesn’t mean that you allow the problem to snowball into a bigger one before you start realising that you need to do something about it.
It’s really about catching the right timing, and nipping it in the bud where it should be, and when it should be.
How to know when is the right timing? Well, it takes practice, and a lot of mutual understanding between both parties (in the context of dating). In the context of pimples, well, maybe I just need to look for my beautician instead of taking matters into my own hands, and ended up making it worse!
Hmm, maybe some visualisation may help hee hee ^o^
Since Year 2004 & 2005, we are swarmed with a myriad of all sorts of “Super” & “Idol” contests on TV – Project Superstar, SuperHost, Singapore Idol jus to name a few.
I didn’t really watch Project Superstar, but I do know that the female winner Kelly Poon, was once voted out of the competition but got a chance to re-contest, as they have yet got to the stage where an elimination is “the” elimination. She had a Second Chance. And, she came back, fought more strongly than ever, and clinched the overall 2nd top most position, beating the rest of the female contestants.
Was she lucky? Yes, we can all say that she is lucky because she wasn’t eliminated in the later rounds. But, I’m dead sure that it’s certainly not luck that crowned her eventually. It must be her belief, her drive, her passion for singing, and of course, the undying support from her family, friends and very importantly, her fans!
In life, we don’t always get a second chance. Agree? But when we do, be sure to be grateful for it, and be even more sure to put in your best, your very best to be even much better than you were before, because only by surpassing yourself and getting the best out of this opportunity can you really honestly look straight into the person’s eye, the one who granted you this chance, and extend your gratitude.
Occasionally, you may not realise that you do have another go, as it may slip in so quietly and unnoticed, especially if you are too engrossed in your loss that you missed it. Because, don’t be surprised that you could be just be the one to grant yourself this possibility.
And, this golden rule in the Ultimate Success Formula always applies – There Is No Failure, Only Feedback! Use it to make your 2nd Chance a much better than the 1st!
As I was rushing last night, I saw a queue of taxis lining up from across the street where I was, next to a taxi-stand. So, I decided to walk slightly longer distance to catch a cab opposite.
So, I would like you to imagine about 5 taxis lining up across the pathway, waiting for passengers. There’re some distance between the 1st two cabs and the last 3. As I approached this queue, cos I was coming from the back, so yup, you probably guessed it right, I hopped on to the FIRST cab nearest to me, which, yes, was the LAST cab in the queue. The rest of the cabs which are in front have to just stare at us while we sped off!
I didn’t think much of it at first, until I settled myself in the taxi (cos by then I was kinda perspiring quite a bit). Then it sort of hit me that, hey, although you may seem to be standing in the last position, in whichever context it may be, e.g. a competition, a tender, knowledge etc, you never know who’s going to emerge the winner until the very last minute, or rather, second. Because, if you believe that you will make it, and by knowing where you compare against the rest (could be your competitors, your goal, or even, yourself!), you will find a way to reach your destination, with the reward you totally deserve in hand.
Of course, it also depends on how badly you want it.
Perhaps you may attribute it to luck, well, I can’t totally say luck hasn’t got a hand to play in this. But, if luck is something beyond your control, shouldn’t we focus everything in all the aspects within our own control and make things happen?
As we all love to say in AKLTG – If You Can’t, Then You Must!
Have you given up on something half-way when you realised you seem to be far behind? If you have, isn’t it time to rethink the reason you gave up was? Because you didn’t believe you can make it? Because you realised you didn’t want it that badly, after all? Or it just seems too long and too much time and effort?
If you didn’t believe you can make it – it’s time to work on your beliefs. By merely shifting them to positive and empowering ones, say it out and repeat to yourself over and over again everyday in your mind, you will soon begin to notice how effective it could be.
If you realise you didn’t want it that badly – it’s time to recall why you chose to start it in the first place. Then think through what happened which may have caused you to lose the passion or interest along the way. Think long and hard. At the end of this process, you would have discovered and know yourself much better. Trust me, it really works!
If it just seems too long and too much time and effort – it’s time to think is this a recurring pattern in your life to choose the easy way out and give up just because the journey seems too daunting, challenges prove to be too challenging, obstacles happen to be too stubborn to move? If it is, yes, it could be painful to acknowledge this, then ask yourself, is this a useful pattern, or not? Or, is it because you realise you didn’t want it that badly? If so, please refer to the above point.
Anyone who came out tops despite initial setbacks that see you falling behind from the rest? Share with us your success stories here and serve as an inspiration to the rest who are still holding on, doing their best to leap further, because they strongly believe. J
First, or Last? You Will Know, Provided You Are Still In Action.
My dear friend, Charles Ram from Ram’s Shoes (ladies, this is the exact place you should go for excellent quality custom-made shoes!) gave me this mini poster. Very meaningful, so I’m sharing with you now J
8 Gifts That Do Not Cost A Cent:
1. THE GIFT OF LISTENING …
But you must REALLY listen.
No interrupting, no daydreaming, no planning your response. Just listening.
2. THE GIFT OF AFFECTION …
Be generous with appropriate hugs, kisses, pats on the back and handholds.
Let these small actions demonstrate the love you have for family and friends.
3. THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER …
Clip cartoons. Share articles and funny stories.
Your gift will say, “I love to laugh with you.”
4. THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE …
It can be a simple “Thanks for the help” note or a full sonnet.
A brief, handwritten note may be remembered for a lifetime, and may even change a life.
5. THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT …
A simple and sincere, “You look great in red,” “You did a super job” or “That was a wonderful meal” can make someone’s day.
6. THE GIFT OF A FAVOUR …
Every day, go out of your way to do something kind.
7. THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE …
There are times when we want nothing better than to be left alone.
Be sensitive to those times and give the gift of solitude to others.
8. THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION …
The easiest way to feel good is to extend a kind word to someone, really it’s not that hard to say, Hello or Thank You.
Isn’t it wonderful to know all of us have innate abilities to make anyone feel good, anywhere and anytime? J
Enchanted One|W|P|hey Kloudiia. Nice use of ambiguity.. brenda
kloudiia|W|P|Hey Bren! Thank you :) What a Nice and Pleasant surprise to hear from you :)Yeah, very happy that I've 1 more new reader yippie! ^o^v
Enchanted One|W|P|=)
Ha! Well well well, what a nice scope ambiguity. Thanks to Violet, who thought my blog “My Boyfriend is not SNAG, Yet” is referring to really my “my boyfriend”, per se. Ok ok, just to set things straight – it’s just my views as a 3rd person ok. Thought that having a catchy title would be kind of kinky, well it sure adds up to what we would probably call scope ambiguity in NLP?
In this case, guess we’ll just leave it as Boyfriend Ambiguity then. Haha :)
Ok, I got to apologise. This post is really more for girls. But hey guys, you can still read too if you are keen to know how what I’m going to say will benefit you ultimately J
Girls, how many times have you experienced some disappointments when your man doesn’t do certain things that you hope he would without you telling or hinting him? I mean, we girls like to be surprised each time, don’t we? Not necessary with gifts or such, but more of the sensitivity he displays, the lovingness, the “gentlemenness” etc.
I know many girls fret when their boyfriends neglected to offer their food to them (as most girls do like to share food), to remember what they like or dislike, to carry their bags when its heavy, to notice they may be feeling grouchy due to certain monthly biological conditions (haha J), to pay attention to them when they feel like talking etc. I could name more examples, but the gist of it is simply – what if he just isn’t that sensitive and loving?
Instead of fuming and flaring up, why don’t you use another strategy instead – remind him gently. And when he remembers to do it the next time, please keep in mind to thank him and appreciate him making the effort for remembering and doing, just to make you happy. I know many of you may be saying, it just doesn’t feel the same anymore when he did it cos he was told to, rather than out of his own will (it’s like his efforts have to be discounted, am I right?).
Another way you could get your man to be more sensitive and loving towards you is, simply, communication. Tell him how much you feel loved when he do certain things, so that he will know what pleases you, and what don’t.
Girls, do not expect your man to display such affection as if they are on auto-pilot mode. Cos, they may not be used to that, yet. But that certainly doesn’t mean they cannot be. It just takes some form of installing these concepts into their head, and some gentle reminders along the way, finally bearing in mind to reward them when they do.
Look at it from this angle - isn’t it good news that he’s willing to improve and become better, then you keeping quiet and hoping that he’ll one day realise it himself, which, there might be a chance that he never will?
Afterall, it takes two to tango to keep both parties happy, isn’t it?
kloudiia|W|P|Ha! I'm writing this as a 3rd person perspective, things I've come across, la! Not talking about mine heh heh :)Hey, thanks for reading my blog. I read yours too, in case you may not know ;p
I was attending my fortnightly RCIA last Friday, and one of the priests Father Joe addressed us very briefly in the beginning of the session. As he described how this 18 month journey of attending RCIA would be like, he used this analogy of a new relationship. This was about what he said: “As with any new relationship, you will surely feel excited, and yet at the same time, a little bit worried and some anxiety that things may not turn out good …”
Wow! This really struck a chord in my heart! It instantly reminds me of a member who just told us that she’s seeing someone now, and although its over the phone, her happiness and excitement is just too much to hide. We can almost feel the flush on her face as she told us animatedly how she feels towards this new man in her life. And, sure enough, after a little pause, she started to share some concerns and worries she have. It may not be problems that have already surfaced, it’s just a pre-mature anxiety that what if things may not work out etc.
Putting myself in her shoes, I really could feel how she felt. In a new relationship, the kind of happiness one feels can really be shown, and is, without doubt, contagious ha! J Yet, she still feels anxious about what the future will bring for them.
So, our advice to her and to all of you who just embarked on a new relationship – take it easy, embrace and savour every moment of your new found happiness with your special someone, for it really takes so much and is so hard just to find someone whom you can fall in love with.
And when problems or conflicts surface, as they surely will, handle it one at a time. Key to remember is – always tackle the issue at hand, and always resolve it. A good discussion or argument would be one that not only resolves the matter but also allows you to know more about your partner. In this way, you grow together.
Do not allow the conflict to deepen and fester itself, or lead yourself into the black pit thinking he/she does not love you anymore. It doesn’t take just one issue to erase all the feelings you have for one another. It’s a snowball effect.
DO NOT bring the same matter up again in future, once it has been resolved with mutual understanding. This may sound all too familiar to you, yet, I’ve seen couples quarreling over issues that have gone stale, and being dug out, put over the fire, and re-cook all over again. How useful is this? You shall be the judge.
As the fresh new Budget 2006 was unveiled yesterday by our Prime Minister Mr Lee Hsien Loong, the focal point was on rewarding, and distributing the fruits of our nation’s labour to the most needy, and those who had indeed worked hard and bore the brunt of all the economic restructuring that took place.
Indeed, this comes at a timely moment I would say. Kudos!
As I read through the Budget, I was thinking – “Hmm, men all like to be rewarded, don’t we?” Doesn’t this simple principle also apply to dating, too? Think about this, when you do something nice to or for your partner, wouldn’t it feel equally good that you get appreciated for your effort and even more wonderful if you get rewarded as well? I’m not referring to exactly very big gifts in return, but rather very simple things like a big kiss, a foot massage, a home-cooked meal (if you have culinary skills to boast of would certainly be very welcomed J) etc.
How about some naughtiness? Think of novel ideas to surprise and reward your partner, something you know that will surely leave him wanting for more, which also means you could expect him to do nicer things to make you happy, so on and so forth.
So girls, if you haven’t been rewarding your man, it’s time to make it a habit to start now. I’m sure they’ll love you for this J And, you can be happier too! How nice, isn’t it?
As promised, I’m gonna start on a mini-series on the reflections I gained after spending 2 days packing my room. It was really a back-breaking, nerve-racking and head-splitting exercise for me, as you shall find out why.
Due to a recent event that happened, I suddenly saw my house filled with loads and loads of stuff for me to pack and clear, on top of the molehill (more empowering la, as compared to mountain I suppose ha J) of stuff I have in my already filled-to-every-corner-that-I-can-find room. Disaster!!!
In order for me to finish this dreadful exercise in the shortest time possible, I had to get myself into a really resourceful state – highly organised and highly efficient. And, in order for me to go into that state, I need to find a motivation factor, which I easily found, very soon. Whew! J
Ok, not to dig into the boring and tedious details of the spring cleaning itself, what I want to say is, as with all spring cleaning, while taking down those shoe boxes that’s been hidden up there in the cupboard, I noticed that they have turned yellowish, with dark spots all around. Natural thing to expect, since I haven’t touched it for years! As I removed the covers of each box, and the moment I looked in, sometimes I went “Wow! I never knew I had this or I almost forgot I had this!”, and sometimes I just go – “What the hell am I keeping this for?” The feeling is as if I am opening up a treasure box, not knowing or expecting what I’ll find inside, yet at the same time, have some kind of knowingness of what’s lying in there, waiting to be rediscovered.
So, what have I discovered during this process? That’s coming up next, in Spring Cleaning Series – Part 1. J
Remember the song “Sacrifice”? Actually, to be honest, I don’t really remember who sang it, but I do remember the first sentence that goes “Sacrifice, it’s a simple word”
Is it really true that Sacrifice is just a simple word? Yes and No. Yes, it is simple enough to pronounce (haha J), but No because it requires a helluva lot of action, time and effort to achieve that. And most importantly, the drive or cause has got to be strong enough for one to lose certain things that are important but not as important compared to the source of motivation. If we can give up or let go of certain things without having to go through certain amount of struggle, then to me, that’s not considered sacrifice.
What are some of the things that are generally important? Time, for one, especially for people who are so busy that any time left for them to spend with their loved ones or to rest is really god-given. How about your dream? Career? Certain way of lifestyle? I’m sure there’re many others, but I shall not delve too much on the examples.
So, what then could be the source or the drive to make one willing to sacrifice? Love, money, goal, ambition, family etc. As you can see, they are indeed very closely linked to your value set, and what priority do you give to each of them. Since I’m very much in the dating angle, shall we talk about Love ok?
We all have heard of going the extra mile to do something or for someone. How much more or further are you willing to go for the person you love? Again, it depends on how deep your love towards him/her is, isn’t it? But what if the thing really requires you to do it at the expense of trading off something that’s very important to you? Will you still do it out of love? And if you do, would you feel that it’s an unreasonable demand or expectation from your partner that’s being imposed on you? Would you feel frustrated, or unhappy that you have to make such a sacrifice per se?
How about you feeling happy that you are able to do something for your partner that meant a lot to him/her, even though it also means giving up certain things that meant a lot to you? But is this kind of tradeoff worth while for you?
In a relationship, compromise is inevitable. So is sacrifice. If we’re not ready and willing to do this, then I would suggest taking a step back, relook at your relationship from a 3rd person’s perspective, and ask yourself this question – are you ready for love? Cos, love is not just a four letter word. It has a much more significant and symbolic meaning behind it, through your words, action, and commitment.
Any views or comments on this? I’d like to hear if you have any views different from mine. Just drop me a note, you know where to find the link don’t you? It’s just below haha J
Ok ok, I know I’m late. Its 2 days post Valentine’s Day, but I only managed to find time now to write this post. It’s better late than never right? Haha J
Guess what? I got a very pleasant surprise on Vday, when I received a sunny sunflower together with a bear sent to my home! Haha, good way to start my day, wouldn’t you agree? Yes. But, I wasn’t exactly elated because I soon realised that I don’t know who the sender was! There was no name on the card!
However, I wasn’t kept in the suspense for toooo looong, before I knew it was from my buddy! Yeah! Of course, it held a special meaning, because it reaffirms that friendships could also be celebrated on this special day, isn’t it?
One more cause for joy J Thanks buddy, you know who you are, don’t you?
Hey, it’s 14th February again! Wow, time really flies ya. Whenever it comes to certain festive occasions, like New Year’s Day, Chinese New Year, Valentine’s Day, Christmas Day etc, we all tend to start recalling what did we do, or who were we with the previous year, and the year before that, and before that so on and so forth. It’s really a time to reminisce about the fond memories you had and the happy times you shared with your loved ones. They may not necessary be your partner, they could really be your family, close friends, relatives etc.
You see, the real meaning of celebration is when you are with people whom you really care about, and who hold certain weight in your heart. That’s what really counts. Because you know you will be basked in all their well-wishes as much as you are giving them.
How about memories that are, well, not so fondly memorable? I’ll talk about this in my later post, as part of my Spring Cleaning series coming up next J
HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY to all of you! Stay happy, chirpy, and pretty!
Just for fun, and some laughs ha! J
I was having a meal with someone recently, and after we finished the waiter came and asked if he could remove my calories. I was taken aback, and of course, my first natural response to that was “I’m sorry, what did you just say?” to which he replied “May I remove your cutleries” and he pointed to my fork and knife which have been placed on the plate that he was clearing.
Ha! We couldn’t stop laughing after he cleared my plate, together with my “Calories”. Hmm, how wonderful if a restaurant has this capability to remove all your calories you’ve taken – wouldn’t it be a haven for all the ladies out there?
Well, in any case, I decided that he has taken away my calories. What a satisfying meal … ^o^
Thanks to Alvin Soon, one of the Life Coaches with AKLTG (read more of their insightful insights on their blog: http://lifecoachesblog.com) for his gentle reminder, that jolted me for an instant and led me to think further that same night. Why should I spend time telling others what I didn’t do, instead of celebrating my victories and achievements I’ve made over time? Even if they come in small doses, but wouldn’t it be much worthwhile to talk about them, rather than, talking about why you didn’t do certain things. This to me, also means that, instead of building on your own strengths and forte to make it even stronger, you turn your head towards your weaknesses and blow it up. Sometimes, when you do this too often, you may run into the danger of blowing it out of proportion! That’s bad.
Whether you are Optimistic, or Pessimistic, really, it is only in the choice you make. Of course you should reflect on the reasons why you aren’t practicing what you preach, all the time. Then, change it by adopting a different strategy towards that matter, or change your state. After that, make things happen. See, there’s really no reason to mop over unhappy things, instead learn to see the bright side of it – what have I learnt?
The glass is still half full. How about yours? Have you made your choice to be optimistic or pessimistic?
Appreciation. Isn’t this just a simple word, yet not a very simple action?
Me and my sister just had an experience today with someone, where, despite our best intentions to do things for the best of others at the expense of countless sleepless nights and stressful days for us, the finger is still pointing to us with a sharp glare.
In the end, we got an apology from her that she really didn’t mean what she wrote, and we should stand in her shoes and understand how she feel. Yes, that’s exactly what we have been doing by putting their feelings above which led us to doing what we did. Instead of being appreciated, we were taken for granted.
More often than not, many of us do and say things coming only from our own perspective, and not thinking of how the recipient will feel from your outpour. How about just taking a minute and walk on the other party’s skin, feel how he/she may feel instead of expecting the other person to be standing behind your back and watching the world from your own angle. Or, even simpler, imagine you are the one receiving this criticism. Would you like to receive feedback in such a manner and form? If the answer is “No”, then you should know what to do. However, if the answer is “Yes”, then probably this person really needs a slap on his back or a rude wake-up call, for whatever reasons that you can justify.
The golden rule still apply – Do not do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you.
Isn’t this simple? Yes, I think it can be. Simply because when I’m being taken care of, in return, I show my appreciation. At times when I forgot, do forgive me, because it is never the case where I’ll take the kind actions and thoughts for granted.
What is LOVE? There are many definitions or explanations regarding this mysterious feeling that creeps into a person’s heart and makes him/her warm all over.
I saw Love in the movie I just seen – Fun with Dick and Jane. Yes, you can safely say this is mostly a comedy, and Jim Carrey indeed had his moments in certain scenes. But I saw something else, which I’m pretty sure people would agree with me. I saw Love, in another form.
When Dick was roughing through the bad patch of not being able to find a job and things were going real bad for the family, it got me thinking – how many couples in real life are able to really go through thick and thin and keep that love and care for each other alive? When things are rosy, couples are all cosy. When things aren’t rosy, you start to see the bad sides of your partner – temperament, stress, slacking around etc.
Jane was supportive of Dick all this while, even to the extent of becoming professional robbers as their sole means of surviving tool. And in one scene when Dick shed tears while watching Jane sleeping with a fat swollen mouth as a result of an allergy reaction, I could almost feel the emotions welled up in him. I was touched.
Notwithstanding bad times, how many couples, whether married or in a dating relationship, have conscientiously put in the effort to keep their sparks alive in normal or even good conditions? How often do you express your feelings and love for each other? How often do you embrace your partner? How often do you say “I love you”? How often do you sit down and really talk to each other? Share your feelings and just talk about anything and everything?
Now you’re asking - is that really all it needs to keep a relationship healthy and growing? Is it simply by saying I love you, give him/her a hug everyday means you are putting in effort? Well, that’s not the case. The case here I’m bringing across is, when you hope to stay forever in love with someone, are you ready, do you want, are you willing to do whatever it takes to work hard at staying in love forever? Or do you simply pray, wish, hope that your love will never go away but not doing anything to keep it alive, and to make it stronger? If you’re not ready, not willing to or find it just too much work and time and effort to be invested, then probably you may not be ready for commitment. Unless companionship to you has a different meaning. I know of couples who got together because, economically, it makes more sense. Or “cents”?
Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Although it has become more of a commercial than a real “love” event, but well it still holds certain meaning, and to do special things for your loved one on that day just seems to have the double effect. But, please don’t forget that, it’s the daily events and interactions that really makes everyday a day worth celebrating for, isn’t it?
Fun With Dick And Jane – go watch it if you haven’t. Good laughs are waiting … J
My purple Creative Zen Micro crashed on me, again! If only you can feel the pain and frustration because of this seemingly intelligent gadget that promises to hold a few thousand songs with a 5GB disk capacity.
I guess my friends got the brunt of all the inconveniences and frustration, as I was mostly involved with the Creative technical guys via the phone, and yes, now I can almost memorise what questions they’ll be asking me if I should call again to rectify another problem. But my friends (3 in all, ha!) were the ones who brought it back to their centre for repair, and yes, they spent loads of time in travelling, explaining the problem, waiting (long and long time in waiting) etc etc. Finally, the last time it was sent back, Creative decided that they might as well give me a brand new set! Wow … in the name of good service ya
And this brand new set, in less than 2 months, just crashed on me and now simply refused to reignite its engine and play me those wonderful music that it’s storing inside, safe and sound. Maybe it’s just me, or my butter fingers?
How many times can one fix a problem before deciding enough is enough? Does it depend on how important that thing is to you? I love listening to music, which is exactly why "YoYo" gave me this for my birthday gift so I can be psyched up with all sorts of songs while I’m on the move. So, my Zen IS important to me, that’s why I actually bothered to call so many times and to bother my friends to help me bring it back to service.
But in terms of relationship problems, how many times can one tolerate his/her partner when too many times disagreements happen, either over trivial matters or bigger issues and you can’t seem to compromise or find a common solution where both parties are happy with? It then depends on how you communicate and the objective you want to achieve in that communication. Do you simply want your partner to buy your idea or are you really willing and open enough to talk it through so you can reach a common ground? Are you honest enough with your feelings? Are you able to express yourself well, or in a way that you can bring your point across the way you want it to be comprehended? Do you get feedback from your partner?
The worst thing that can happen which I have witnessed, through friends and through the people I met ever since I entered the love scene industry, is to keep all those unhappy feelings that arose due to certain situations. Because keeping mum about it is certainly not ever going to solve the problem, which I’m pretty sure most of you know, but yet not all of you will really put to action. The volcano effect will certainly take its toll when enough frustrations were pent up and, good luck to both of you, then.
Then again, there are also some couples who do talk about it, but without arriving at a happy conclusion. Happy meaning both parties are satisfied with the solution. One party may be giving in most of the time, which means, effectively, it’s almost like a 1-way communication that seems like a 2-way discussion. Is this better than not talking? Well yes in a way. At least you get to know what each person is thinking of and their perspectives, and sometimes, their values, depending on the issue at hand. So, since you are already in that topic, why not go a little bit further and suggest all options (from both parties) then go through them one by one. It takes two to tango, so both parties have to be honest with their feelings, not only one.
How much effort you are willing to put in really depends on how much you love him/her, and how much you treasure your relationship with your special someone.
Now, what shall I do with my Zen … hmm
Stuart's Philosophies|W|P|Harlowe! ^_^Sometimes, it's not the Zen Micro, but the software inside that needs upgrading. In fact, when I go my O2 XDA Atom, it was really wonky. I started to blame the O2 for being a lousy phone. Then, I did my research looking at third party comments on the O2, then realized that it's not the hardware but the software.
I suppose it's an apt metaphor for relationships. The guy or girl is never really the issue, but the internal wiring and the software that is loaded inside. I guess when couples date, they need to check - system compatible or not?
Then, if system incompatible, then it may simply mean that the operating systems needs changing. Software can change more easily than hardware, and software can be used to control the output of the hardware functions.